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Zucchini Be Serious?!

As if things weren’t bad enough in the UK, now THIS! I don’t even know if I can go on at this point.

The headline pun is a bit of a fail, given that courgettes are not in any way related to pickles, though it did amuse me that they have a news section specifically dedicated to vegetables. Amazingly, it’s not even the only article on the ‘crisis’ (they actually called it that).

Even more amazing, they invite you to contribute by posting pictures of courgettes… [...]  read more

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Shock As Media Outlet Tells The Truth!

The Sunday Herald’s TV Guide sums things up absolutely perfectly:

President Trump: The Inauguration

“After a long absence, The Twilight Zone returns with one of the most ambitious, expensive and controversial productions in broadcast history. Sci-fi writers have dabbled often with alternative history stories – among the most common is the “What If The Nazis Had Won The Second World War” setting – but this huge interactive virtual reality project, which will unfold on TV, in the press, and on Twitter over the next four years, sets out to build an ongoing alternative present. [...]  read more

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Love Me Or Else!

I’m sure it’s probably just me, but I find that a lot of the ‘relationship goals’ type posts and memes that people share constantly on Facebook are neither cute, sexy or adorable; in fact I find them downright fucking creepy and disturbing. If your ‘bae’ keeps sharing these on your timeline or tagging you in them, my suggestion is: Run! Run for the hills before it’s too late! Also, if your significant other refers to you as ‘bae’, that’s a good reason to dump them too… [...]  read more

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Call me stupid, but…

Right. So our latest brilliant idea to thwart terrorism and keep our country safe from extremists is that parents who are worried about their children being or becoming radicalised can report them and the government will seize or cancel their passports so they can’t fuck off to Syria and get themselves killed.

Now, call me stupid, but do we want to trap the – now even more angry at us – west hating extremist terrorist types in our country? I’m not seeing how that’s a ‘good thing’ that will keep us safer? [...]  read more

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Is it because I is black?

Statistics are fun, aren’t they? All over the news today is the revelation that black people are three times more likely to have a Taser used against them. As in, they apparently make up around 4% of the UK population, but account for 12% of the incidents where a taser was used and ethnicity was recorded. The lions share in the Metropolitan area, obviously.

However. Here’s some more statistics that are often bandied about when it suits the media, but doesn’t seem to merit mentioning in this particular story (because it wouldn’t be half as sensational then!) : Despite the fact that in London 12% of men are black – almost 3 times the national average – black men account for 54 per cent of the street crimes committed by men in London, and 46 per cent of the knife crimes and more than half of the gun crimes are thought by the Metropolitan Police to have been committed by black men. [...]  read more

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VW: Still Cheating and Lying!

“This was not a corporate decision, This was something individuals did.”
“a couple of software engineers who put this in for whatever reason.”

— Michael Horn, head of Volkswagen’s American unit, before a House Energy and Commerce subcommittee hearing

Even if this were the tiniest bit believable, it MUST have been common knowledge that the engines VW built were outputting up to 40 times the legal emissions limits, and that somehow, magically, mystically, they all passed their emissions tests, and no one at VW questioned that? [...]  read more

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Oh, Good.

They’ve already started going on about Christmas Meals and Parties and shit at work. Four more months of ‘No, really, I am NOT going. Yes, I know there’s free food and drink. No, it makes fuck all difference. Now respect my wishes and the fact I’m a grumpy cunt and go enjoy it without me, because if you force me to go against my will I’ll fucking make sure none of you enjoy it…’

Fuck I fucking hate fucking Christmas. Even in September.

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